Today's story is dedicated to Michelle and Gloria. Thank you.
One morning, a couple of week's ago, I stumbled into my bathroom to begin my usual morning routine. As I approached the sink, I noticed that it was inhabited. Now, I know that many people get totally freaked out by spiders. But, not me. When I find a spider in my home, I either leave it alone, or move it to a more suitable location. I think I get this from my mom. She doesn't mind spiders in the house. She says that they "take care" of the other insects. Plus, I am the kind of person who is saddened when a tree falls.
My plan was to gently coax the spider onto a piece of toilet tissue and free it in the basement (which is a creepy -crawly buffet for spiders in my old house.) But, the spider didn't know my good intentions. She saw me coming and climbed down to her safety inside the drain. I could see her sitting there on the drain wall, waiting patiently for the danger to pass. Not knowing how long she would stay there, I called to my husband and told him not to use the sink. (He is used to the crazy lengths I will go to save a critter.)
I thought that I was going to have to wait until after my shower before the spider came out. But, to my surprise, she was a gutsy little thing. This time, I outsmarted her and plugged the drain, eliminating her only escape route. I managed to persuade her to step onto the tissue paper. As I carefully wrapped the sides of the tissue loosely around her, I noticed that she curled herself up into a tight little ball. There was nothing left for her to do, but hunker down and hope for the best. Quickly, I took her down to the basement and set the tissue on the floor. She was free.
As I got ready for the day, I thought about how that little spider and I are a lot alike. Sometimes I feel so incredibly frightened, that I want to curl up in a ball and wait for the danger to pass. Limited to a consciousness inside a human brain, I cannot see the bigger picture. All any of us can see is what we experience. We are born. We live. We die. That situation renders us almost helpless. But, unlike the spider, we have the ability to reflect on our limited awareness.
Some people take comfort in being part of the "supreme species" -- the human race. It makes them feel strong and secure. I, on the other hand, take comfort in knowing that I am not much different than any other animal on this planet. I have my conscious limitations, just like the spider in my sink. She didn't know that I was bringing her to a better place. I don't know where this cancer journey is going to take us. But, I have faith that wherever it leads, ultimately we will all be in a better place. Someone who can see the big picture will carry us to eternal safety.
Beautiful, Kerry. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteMaura
I hope that things are going well for you and your mom. Take comfort. We are all in this together.
DeleteKerry, this was one of your best entries on this written path. It made me shiver. First you made me check out frogs and now I will look at spiders in a totally different way. Had a fabulous phone chat with Mimi yesterday and we want to do it often. She made my day!
ReplyDeleteMy mom absolutely LOVED talking with you! The fact that two people could connect the way that you did after 50+ years strengthens my belief that we are all one. Thank you so very much for reaching out to her!
DeleteI'm a little slow and just read this. Great post, Kerry! (I agree with you and your mom on spiders... just let 'em be...) Centipedes on the other hand...
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